The week I almost melted my parents

304 days.  That's how long was since I last saw my parents.  We had just completed our first cross country RV trip and my 3rd sister was getting hitched in California; it was epic.  How could we top that this time around?  Well, throw in a record heat wave (think 107... every. single. day.), a literal crash course in river tubing, a winning Rockies game and driving into a wildfire, and you've got yourself some solid competition.

We somewhat stumbled upon the river tubing thing while sweating our way through dinner in Golden.  If you look at the picture below, directly over my Mom's shoulder and across the railing is a mildly raging river with kids jumping in and out of rapids, whilst families young and old jet by them on inflatable tubes.  So, as we sat melting into our dinner plates, an idea was forming in our minds...

This was our "Trial Run."  Multicolored loungers and at $3 a pop nonetheless!  We had such a promising start, but as my mother so beautifully demonstrated, our lack of steering control proved problematic and things quickly went awry.  Somehow, I remembered this idea being a lot more promising in the clearance toy aisle of Target. 

We ditched the tubes and opted for a nature-made water chute. Just dive in and let the rapids sweep you 15 feet downstream where you'll pop back up, swim to shore and do it all over again. Instant gratification.

OK, take 2.  Despite the odd croissant shape of one, we found some legit tire tubes and figured we'd risk life and limb down the rivers of fortune again. Besides, it was still hovering around 104 and we were desperate for the cool mountain water. We also came sporting some goggles to help search for my Dad's lost wedding ring, an unfortunate casualty from our first attempt the day before.

Which of these things is not like the others?  Hmm, maybe the tube on the far left that looks like a freaking croissant...

No luck finding the ring, but the tire tubes were a huge improvement.  Well... 2/3's of an improvement until we finally exchanged out that wonky one. Next stop, the Rockies games. Before you start wondering why we're all sporting ascots, you should know they're actually Kool-ties - scarfs filled with polymer crystals that slowly release water in a cooling action (in other words, it cools your blood and turns your vascular system into an internal AC device).  We sell them at REI...

Day 3 we decided to drive up to Boulder to visit Brandon at his new job (more on that in another post), and hold on... what's that?  Another wildfire making it's way over the ridge towards the city... awesome.  Roll up your windows, the smell of smoke is burning my throat. Thankfully, after a few days this fire was contained, but not before ordering several evacuations in the city and giving my mother yet another reason why I should move with her back to Florida. 

At one point, I happened upon this scene in my living room, and I remember thinking "Geez, I wore them all out. Even the dog is pooped."  I guess I'll give a little credit to the heat though.  In the end, we had a great time and we even got to celebrate my Mom's birthday on their last day here.  My Dad summed it up best, however:  "Nothing against you, Jen. But I'm really happy we're leaving tomorrow, it's been crazy here."

At least Ollie is stuck with us.