Reflecting on a crazy month

It's hard to believe all that's happened these past 30 days. Brandon and I left our jobs and salaries, we downsized 99.9% of our belongings, we drove halfway across the country to a city where we had no employment opportunities, no housing and no plan. As if life wasn't crazy enough, we then took two weeks and drove towards the Pacific with an RV and my entire family.  Throw in a wedding, Brandon's birthday, our 3rd wedding anniversary, another road trip, a pending job offer, the start of grad school classes, an ongoing apartment search and a slowly diminishing bank account, and that brings us just about back up to date.

Brandon on his birthday!  Officially homeless and in the parking lot of crappy motel... what a trooper.

Our favorite after-dinner tradition with Aunt Wendy: tequila and lime ice pops

Spending our 3rd anniversary in Zion National Park up the Narrows Trail.  

My hubby, the future grad school grad.  Look!  He's got his spiral notebook and pencil case too.

And while it's easier to post fun pictures and describe all our comings and goings as "adventures," it's not always truthful. So, in response to the many questions we're getting about how we are and what we're doing, I'll offer up a bit of transparency (because I think we all secretly love an "Oh, you're screwed up, too?" story, just as much as an "Us against all odds" success story).

Our first week back in Denver after the road trip extravaganza, I had dream after dream about being buried alive or not being able to breath. Since then, I've fought the same cold three times because my body just can't keep up, I've worn and reworn the same pathetic outfit because all my good clothes are packed away, and my blood pressure (although probably due more to the altitude adjustment) is through the roof. You'd think with all this going on I'd want to get out of the house, explore and take a breather, but honestly, the four walls of our borrowed guest room is the only thing that's familiar to me right now, and - as pathetic as that sounds - it's comforting to have that small bit of stability stacked against the overwhelming uncertainty.

So, no,  life doesn't feel adventurous today. It feels chaotic, lonely and insurmountable.

Here's where I act like a 2 year old and throw a hissy fit in front of God.
I say, "Why am I STILL waiting to hear back from this job interview?"  
And He goes, "When you didn't have time to find an apartment, who provided a place for you to eat and sleep and put all your junk?"  
Then I say, "How will we pay our bills, and now grad school, if it doesn't work out?" 
And He goes, "Who provided the opportunities for you to work beforehand so you could pay off all your debt and save?"
Then I say, "But why can't you just do it my way, right now, so I can feel better already?"
And He goes, "You're missing the point."

The point is, I have to trust Him. Especially on days like today, when I get so worried about all the thing's He's not doing, that I overlook all He's BEEN doing. From the moment we left NY, God has provided for us each step of the way, and if I had nothing else to go on, His track record alone should suffice.

It's gonna work out.
Somehow. Someway. Someday.

Now it's time for me to go put on my big girl pants and live more adventures.  Happy Tuesday everyone.