Interview with my Goddaughter

Me:  How old are you, Faith?
Faith:  11

Me:  If you could invent a holiday, to get off school, what would it be?
Faith:  I have no idea.
Me:  Seriously, Faith. You can't think of ANYTHING?
Faith:  *Blank stare*  I dunno...

Me:  Okay, let's try starting off with an easier question.  Maybe you're just nervous about your internet debut on my blog.  Without naming names, what is your weirdest relative like?
Faith:  She's sitting in the chair right next to me.
Me:  So you're saying it's me?
Faith:  Yes. Definitely.
Me:  What's so weird about me?  Give it to me straight. I can handle it.
Faith:  I can't do this right on the spot... I dunno...
(She sees me typing her response)
Faith:  Wait! No, don't write that! That's the second time you wrote that.
Me:  Well, then give me some new material to work with!
Faith:  *Sigh*  It's just that you have random moments where you shout out, like "Ylaaahhhhhh."
Me:  And that makes me weird?
Faith:  I mean, I guess so.
Me:  Hmm... Next question.

Me:  Cats or dogs?
Faith:  Dogs.
Me:  Why?
Faith:  Cats can't fetch. Or play with you.

Me:  If I were to look in your refrigerator right now, what would I find in it?
Faith:  What's up with these questions? You are sooo weird...  Um, food, I guess?  Milk...

Me:  Do you know how to drive a car?
Faith:  What?  No.  No, I don't.
Me:  I won't tell your parent's even if you do...
Faith:  I don't, honestly.

Me:  If you could be any type of fruit what would it be?
Faith:  I would be a watermelon because they're really big and really good.
Me:  So you're saying that you want be an obese and obedient child?
Faith:  NO! Hahahaha.
Faith's Dad chimes in:  Faith, you know millions of people are going to read this.
(He's clearly overestimated my blogging popularity)

Me:  If you could ask God one question, what would it be?  I know what I would ask.
Faith:  Really, what?
Me:  Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons, duh.
Faith:  Haha, nice.  I would ask, Are there dogs in heaven?
Me:  Why? Are you hoping to see Hudson there?
(Hudson was the family's first Golden Retriever who met an untimely end).
Faith:  Yeah.

Me:  Well, your Mom is saying it's time for you to go to bed. I'll think of more questions tonight, and we can continue Part 2 of your riveting interview tomorrow.
Faith:  Good night, Jennie. Love you!